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A few postings ago I put up the story of how my employment and job seeking went from years 1 through 5. At the end of this story I make mention of the week where I have two great job offers and I was not sure how to choose.  This posting is that story. I am going to write this out telling you how I thought about it at that time. This is not sarcasm. (Well in this posting there isn’t any).

What you will read here IS HOW I thought about all of it as it all unfolded.

I had recently finished my 9 month training program for networking and had passed my Novell certification test. With that on my resume, I was actually getting replies to my letters and interviews were going well. So well that in one week of the summer of 95  I found myself with two job offers! This was, no doubt, the result of patiently practicing and living the 12 steps. The tests and trials GOD has wanted me to walk through were finally coming to an end. And I was happy to see that happen.

The first offer was for a job working for an internationally known computer science company as one of their help desk guys. And if things went well, I would also get to assist the department’s VB programmers. Really good pay, benefits, a job I could do and with an opporunity to learn VB programming. And to top it all off, the job was located in the southbay where I wanted to move back to asap!

The second job offer was something I had not considered before - IT contracting. This was a small consulting firm but they were working in all sorts of new technologies. There wasn’t anything they were currently doing that I knew how to do. I didnt even think I was qualified for the position. And working a program of honesty, I told the partner who interviewed me this.

They assured me that what they saw in my test results and in my resume was that I was the kind of troubleshooter they wanted on the team. The new technologies were easy to learn; troubleshooting was not so easy to learn. And they felt I would do just fine in this position. They offered me $34 per hour. At  that time, I was NOT an IT guy with plenty of experience. My last fulltime IT job was 38K per year and ended 4 years and 10 months ealier. This was a very flattering offer to be given.

I knew from my 4th and 6th step work that I tended to make too many decisions that were ‘fear-based’. I usually took the safest roads possible. I was not a big fan of going into the unknown. I knew that my typical choice would be the permanent position. Contracts can end without notice and before they are scheduled to end. They had no benefits. On the other hand, while the permanent position would have me doing lots of work I already knew how to do, it did have benefits, steady 9 to 5 hours and no worry about where will I work in 6 months.

It’s a lot to consider but I am working the program now and its time for me to bring this knowledge into my work affairs too. I wanted to make the right decision, and not just once again make the safe one. Apply the tools of the program, I check my motives, I share my thoughts on whats going on with my sponsor and listen to his input and of course, I pray about making the right decision.

I go with the consulting firm as I am feeling confident that my motives are to not be afraid of new risks. Also that I needed to learn to trust the partners assurances that I was perfect for this job. This was not a decision based on money. This was a decision that did not run from a fearful choice. In other words, I ‘apply these principals in all my affairs’.

So what happened? Well before we get to what happened, I want to give you a little picture of how at that time in my life, I am living the 12 steps as part of my daily life. It will be quick, I promise, and then we get to what happen.

I moved to the east end of Pasadena to be near the I.T. school. Living on unemployment checks of 190 bucks a week, I live in a $500 studio apartment in a building where I am one of the few english speaking, US citizens living in the building. While it is a tiny single room apartment I live in, I am fortunately one of the few people in the building who gets the room to himself. All of my neighbors have at least a spouse and 2 kids in their single rooms. My car is a 1974 Dodge Dart. It has doors and quarter panels from other cars. Not only is the power steering almost competely gone, but the front alignment is so off that replacement tires now only last 30 to 40 miles tops before they strip down to the belts and go flat. I only driving to meetings within town, to the grocery store and to school. Other than job interviews, I dont drive anywhere that is more than 5 miles away.

I go to school part time and I went to meetings five times a week but still I had too much free time. I did what anyone working the program would do - I signed up to lead H & I panels and I signed up to hold a phone shift at the central office. In fact, I signed up for a weekly phone shift for both AA and CA. I had the time so why not?  And for panels, I found myself with 3 monthly commitments while living in Pasadena. One was for the childrens rehab ward at a local hospital. This was (sadly) filled with 12 to 17 year olds who had drug and alcohol problems. The second panel was at a county mental health LOCKDOWN facility in Duarte. The 3rd monthly panel was your normal adult rehab outpatient panel.

I did not do any of this thinking some reward would be forthcoming. I did these service commitments because I had the time to do them and I wanted something to do other than go to school and sit in my one room apartment listening to crying babies and people shouting in foreign languages.  See, there is no holy reasoning going on here. Just practical “how can I do something with my time that will make my week go better for me?”

Now that’s the snapshot of Harry’s life from 94 to summer of 95. OK so back to the tale of two job offers……….TWO WEEKS AFTER ACCEPTING the contractors job and turning down the permanent job at the computer science company, I was fired from the contractors job.  Why did I get fired? Because I did not know any of the new technologies they were using. yeah Yeah, I know you are certain I told the guy I didnt know those technologies and they said that’s ok.  Well you dont need to scroll up, yes I wrote that and yes they did say that and yes two weeks later they fired me for not knowing the new technologies.

I was dumbfounded, shocked, blindsided. (Now in 2006 I laugh at a Harry so naive. I wasnt like that before, how the hell did I get like that). But deserved or not, I was unemployed.  Immediately after they broke the news to me, before I head home, I call that corporation to find out if they still got that southbay job. The manager said just yesterday they had a guy accept their offer. The manager also wanted to mention that I was his first choice by far and he was really annoyed he needed to pick the distant second place guy.

Did you think that was the icing on the cake for the day? That the manager of the other job told me that? Oh no, not even close. I hop on the downtown bus and it takes me home to Pasadena. Walking to my apartment building’s door, I see something is wrong. My 1974 Dodge Dart was parked right here in front of the building. And now its gone! Todays isnt street sweeping. Did I park it else where and just forgot? No I didnt.

My Dodge Dart was stolen. Oh and in the trunk of my $500 car were about $2000 worth of sears craftsmen tools that I accumulated since 1983. All gone. On the day I got fired.

Was that the icing? No it wasn’t. THIS IS: in four days I was scheduled to sell that car for $800. No really! In California, corporations can get “credit” for their over the yearly limit on EPA emissions and the Chevron Oil company was doing that by buying all operating cars built before 1976. So my piece of crap no power steering balding tires dodge dart was worth 800 bucks - in four days time.  But not anymore it wasn’t.  Now THAT’S the icing on the cake!

Pissed off for a week or two, eventually this became the story I told to my friends for laughs. It was one of God’s loving jokes he plays on his favorites down here. For years, this is a story I tell as an example of “no matter what you think, it aint going to be what God has in store”. I laugh at this week still even today. But back then and all the way til 2004, this was nothing BUT A FUNNY story. A story of bearing humility. Today this day is an example of more than just a funny story.

Oh, so what about the title of this posting? It says “The week that spawned a slogan“. In the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, on page 135 there are three famous old time slogans that all AAers know. “First things First”, “Live and Let Live”, and “Easy Does it.” That night after the police report was filled out, I called my sponsor and he let me let the steam out and bitch about the day.

And I finished that conversation with “well we can add another slogan to that story we just read! “First things First”, “Live and Let Live”, “Easy Does it.” , and “FUCK HARRY”.  My sponsor roared out a laugh. And I repeated this at the next mens meeting we had at his house. For my sponsor and the other guys he sponsors, this was our private joke. Its typical harry humor, if you know me, you know this it true.

The sponsor I am speaking of is still my sponsor today. If you know me, you know him. GO ASK HIM about this story. Ask if I Am exaggerating any thing here? Did I live in the place I say I did? Did I have those commitments ? Did I take them for rewards or for the reasons I said I did? For years afterwards, did i use that story for humor when I told it?  Ask him, at that time, was Harry STILL committed to the 12 steps and the AA Program?

Unfortunately, this story isnt even close to the worse of the bullshit I go through. This story remains a funny story to tell. This is nothing compared to what lays ahead for me in the years of 2001 to 2005; 2004 being by far the worse year of my life. 

Til the next time this is harry saying if you are a hot milf, all four of those sayings still apply!

Harry A.
Sober still as of 8pm PDT August 9th 2006